A Little Celebrity Hatred: To Get You AAAALLL Through the Weekend.

Yep, its true. You can be white trash, even when your Dad is (now a semi-) famous black singer with lots of money. One assumes that songs like ‘Lady,’ etc. are still raking in the royalties. These people DO have money, don’t they?!!!

There’s not other explanation, no other name for it, (except unreasonably rich & stupid) as I read the list of all the bad choices (that means stupid, utterly remorseless things done) made by Nicole Richie. I dislike her and her little bikini too. Seeing her pregnant belly on a disgustingly small frame is just as gross as seeing her disgustingly small frame.

Go to People.com if you want the exact skinny on her DUI, which included being in the absolute opposite lane while drunk or stoned, or WHATever. I can’t keep track of all the really stupid sh_t she does. Shouldn’t that come with jail time? Yes, and it seems a full 82-minutes covered it!

WHAT?!

My main issue with her is that she’s too sarcastic and just too damn mean to live. How anyone got close enough to initially impregnate her and apparently promise to marry her has always boggled my mind, and still seems so questionable. Didn’t anyone tell the little genius that pregnancy is not the cure for anorexia? This pregnancy thing is clearly a ‘paparazzi, leave me alone for a moment’ stunt gone terribly awry.

Maybe if the kid’s lucky, it’ll get passed around each weekend to the other three girl geniuses of our time, to be used in whatever way ‘helps’ their career – Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan, Britney Spears. That’ll give Nicole Ritchie three good weeks per month to drink & smoke crack with all her friends, until it’s her week for her nanny to raise the kid.

Or she could sell it on the black market. Lose it at a music festival. Leave it outside and forget to feed it. Let someone ‘take’ it and gladly pay handsomely to be ransomed for it. If it means no responsibility, I’m sure she’ll go for it and so will most of the public. If anyone actually cared about the baby, we would have already cut it out and put in the belly of the lady who just had baby number 12. I’m thinking she must be pretty nurturing, doesn’t need much media attention, and will hardly notice, physically speaking.

Could any part of the lives of these girls, God don’t make me say it, who are all potential mothers if only because they’ve got the junk, ever be about the KID? B. Spears is just proof-a rooney. If it’s all about Me, how can it ever stop being about Me? Is this all some terrible psychology experiment gone awry? When will it be stopped? Because the rest of us giving them the evil eye does not seem to be working AT ALL!

Worst of all, I really am concerned that 6 months into this pregnancy, Nicole decides to sign up for Alcohol Addiction Help. Is this not a sign that somewhere in the past 6 months that maybe alcohol was an issue for her? Or she is clearly preparing for something that should get her into/and out of court and jail again, and completely knows how to work the system, for once, beforehand? Well, one finger applaud for her.

The best punishment I can think of for Nicole Ritchie (and I for one still think she hasn’t gotten a proper one) is for her to be forced to be in jail until her son or daughter rips their way out of what is a fairly documented pretty tiny space, guaranteed no drugs before or during birth (isn’t that what jail is all about? Getting off the drugs? It’s perfect!). Also, she might realize what just happened (cause I hear it kinda hurts) and stop producing human beings cause it’s FUN, or whatever the celebrities who are actually responsible are saying that year. Babies are not a fashion statement, repeat after me..

The next time I have sex, I will check my pocketbook and buy a condom. Or get my bodyguard to do it.

UPDATE!: (2/05/08) By 12/7/07's post, I was saying much nicer things about Ms. Richie.

In fact, I Nearly retract the ire and annoyance that I felt about her during this post, starting with the 12/7/07 post.

You may want to check it and compare.:)

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All right kids, you be good and no parties in the house. Mom & Dad are going to see this cool band from their youth, called 'Van Halen!' I know, you're jealous 'cause you never get to go anywhere but just keep it to yourself. Maybe we'll get you a shirt.:)

UPDATE! (2/05/08): That was a great show!