I'm not retiring in this hole. Oh, I'm doing fine otherwise, Thank You!

WebSHOT

Okay, so maybe you are wondering: where did Tart go? It's been awhile since anyone's heard. I'm coming up for air.

Well. I said I took care of things for my Dad. All my boxes are safely here in the room with me, needing to be unpacked. Most are books so I'll hold off until we have bookshelves (I know, oh so smart, no?). We have turned Mom's room into an exercise room. I was dragged to one of my hated locations (Lowes? Home Depot?) to choose the rug. Why get a rug when they had this super cool foamy stuff that interlocked together that is squishy when you walk on it! Of course, I had to get the multi-color because I need some joy when I open up the room to...what is it FLYLady calls it...gently move (aka exercise)? No gray for me. Husband did a fantastic job installing it - Thank you Husband!! So the apparent number one use for this stuff is a playroom BUT third down on the package was Gym, so I don't feel silly. :)

Alright, so I went on that cruise. That was super fun. I just ordered all the pictures I had on my hard drive concerning Dad's service and that cruise. I got a super deal because I joined that MIPoints thing where you get points for buying stuff. Hopefully you only buy what you would've anyway and I assume I get something for these frickin' points. Well, I got a super deal on photos, which will be coming in the mail.

I notice that I buy things sometimes to make myself feel better. If nothing else to have something to look forward to. I'm betting almost everyone does this, and I'm betting plenty of bipolars do it so much they don't even think about it. So one puchase I'm looking forward to is...The Bean! Yeah, I saw it on late night TV. I controlled myself, did not impulse buy and thought about it for a while. When I broke down and decided it sounded great I bought the cheapest one. Yeah, they have 4 kinds (basically normal, normal w/ stretchy cuff thingys, wide, and wide w/stretchy cuff thingys) so I applauded myself for buying the 'basic' model. I just know there are some you riveted by all of this.

So what is a Bean? It's exercise equipment in the shape of a bean that you lay on and do your crunches. It comes with DVD for all kinds of other exercises, so you don't feel like you 'wasted' your money a crunch helper. My back is pretty shot, but I know doing crunches would accomplish what I'm looking for - strong tummy = strong back. So I think it will be just the ticket. And I'm super excited.

As usual, as a bipolar I don't know if I'm coming or going emotionally. I do things to keep myself up, no I'm not talking drugs. Just doing stuff, piddling on computer, even doing real work like throwing/shredding masses of our dang paper clutter. And I leave the house occasionally. I try so hard to keep track of my appointments, but I admit I miss stuff sometimes.

Oh, and on the total upside my plans for having an alpaca or two, a farm AND an internet business (I love you Ebay) are looking sweet. I have visited an alpaca farm with Husband and he is totally cool with me buying one! We will visit the location of my family land soon and see the viability there of it, whether to stay on it or sell it. In my mind that money is farm money. Thank you Dad, in a terrible way, you have again made my dreams come true. Wow.

Then, of course, there is the annoy-ing. The letter that sent me into the bipolar uglies, a little screamin', a little stompin.' Google if you want, I'm sure you can find out where I'm talking about but I don't live in a State. No, this is a Commonwealth. That is piteous. It's sort of like being too lazy to actually get married and instead just sitting there and be common-law. But you have the nerve to have official address labels with both names on it. That's what it seems to me when I see 'official letterhead' and I realize what a jackass piece of shit land mass that I live in. Again, they make it that complicated for me to descibe, as it is not a State.

I wonder how many of you will ever find yourself here because you google this problem, much like the masses that end up here because of the SS (Social Security) thing that I occasionally get f'd by.

I'm forced to fill out a form, once a year for the last 10 years, a medical report that I must return to the DMV on time or else they will suspend my driver's license. I do not suffer from seizures, nor do I have a significant ophlamalmic issue requiring said report. I made the deep error over 10 years ago of telling an idiot that I was bipolar, after there were some traffic issues. (Fear not, it was as innocuous as could be.) Ever since then, I have been forced to fill out this form. It really is ridiculous and if I had the money I would sue them for it. I really think this could count as some kind of bizarre predjudice, a true sueable offense. When I leave said Commonwealth I think I'll print what I really think of how things are run here - and ya'll kin jus' kiss may ayass.

So I sent that thing to them 2 weeks before it was due. Imagine my desire to hurt a simple bureaucrat when I open the suspension notice. It was in the evening when they were both safe and unavailable to listen to their well-deserved tirade. I had to wait til today. Yes, Ms. Tart lost it last night. I was mad.

Come to find out when you read the damn thing they are 'giving me' another 20 days. So it's not an immediate suspension like you'd think when first reading a BIG HEADER: NOTICE OF SUSPENSION. Wouldn't you like to beat someone? I want to sue for putting me through this bullshit. When I called I was on hold for 20 minutes, yes, 20 minutes, never getting a person because my call was cut off!! When I immediately called back - the line was busy! Oh Commonwealth, Oh Commonwealth why can't you do nuthin' riiiiiiight???!

So I've been jacked up, down, all a-round, as usual. This is my life. It may be unbelievable that I've only spent a couple of times in the nutty hole. Vive me!!