MY turn to complain.

I just hate myself for not being kinder. For not having empathy in some cases. I am sooooo not perfect, or even close.

I am going crazy thinking about this girl from my baking class. It’s not enough that she is loud and obnoxious, she has Problems too, oh my. Too much Drama. She’s got to tell all or many of her problems to my supervisor, who feels terribly bad for her, (she got the response she wanted) and I feel bad now because my problems are so piddly and little and unimportant, yet I want to kill myself. After all, I don’t have ANY problems being a mentally ill person that drives WAY out of my way to come to this thing, only to be subjected to a very selfish, loud person.

I feel like I must be some kind of bitch to be overwhelmed and concerned about not wanting to go to baking anymore. I can’t imagine getting a more irritating person to work with. I’m thinking about asking the supervisor if I can come back and work in the Spring.

I can’t take the fact that this person takes over ALL conversation. That she totally tries to roll over me, ignores the fact that I am there and then doesn’t allow me to speak.

And she Complains. Complains that everything is too sweet: I reminded her that we are making desserts, not dog biscuits (and not her dinner).

She actually rolls in 20-30 minutes late and then has the nerve to ask what’s done so she can eat it. That totally got on my nerves and I said, “Can you wait?” To which she replied no and then we get a litany of her day and how she hasn’t had Lunch or Dinner. Not my problem. Not something I have any control over. Should we bring snacks for the cow, instead of water for everybody (the supervisor brings water for us many times out of the kindness of her heart)?

We tell her that things aren’t cooled yet, and she say’s “I’m going to eat it, ANYway” and then complains about how sweet it is. Like I care. Except that it feels like a cut on all the hard work that WE did to make the thing, only to get her ‘learned opinion’ that we haven’t please her. Shut up.

I make what the supervisor has us make. I follow the recipe, which this person can’t get through her head, although we all make mistakes (I forgot to put milk into muffins yesterday, making them dry). But Annoying One has said she doesn’t need to measure, like the professionals, as if she was one. We, meaning the supers, have to remind her that she is not a professional. She absolutely does not get that this is a learning experience and that it’s okay to make mistakes (she gets so dithered if ‘her’ stuff is not perfect. Whatever.) So g*d-d*mn annoying.

I feel like my head is taken over by this person. And all the loving that I receive in my life is for nothing, even though my friends were kind to me at Drop in Center beforehand, even though my Husband is nice to me after, I have to recover from this experience. It’s so lame, and it hurts me. I just want to eat or do something to make it go away. After all, I have my problems too, I just don’t spread them around to the people I work with and every d*n person I can get a hold of. Will someone Please MAKE IT STOP!

PS - I know I've got to take over my own Destiny. I can't allow an annoying person to affect me so. But believe me, it's hard when they are so LOUD. And it boggles the mind that they cannot see that they must take responsibility for her own life, as I must mine. I try very hard to purge myself of this and listen to good stuff and try to feel better. And I actually feel better after typing it all out and GETTING it OUT of my system. Thank you, Dear Reader!:)