Tuesday, July 18, 2006

keep it safe & secure

This is very much a reaction to reading mysti's (I keep your name in lower case to differrentiate you from the Lost One, mys', :) and Enigma's blogs and the discussion of safety, disclosure, privacy, and that ultimate question: What and how much do I write and yet keep myself safe from the predator, assumably a man with issues, the weirdo with criminal intent?

I do what I can. It's interesting that Husband, who is quietly one of most perfect guys on Earth, so quiet, in fact that I too, forget it occasionally, well that same guy works with computers daily, as some people know, and he is an absolute stickler for security. So, once again, Smarty-Pants is right.

Here's what I have to say about it as an angry manic-depressive. It peeves me unbelievably that humans commit crimes against other humans, and I wish that the human/as in the victim reaction were one of anger and wanting to make the son of bitch pay, to logically to see it through the judicial system (see I can be remarkably sane, I did NOT say take the 12-guage and blow his head off like the piece of shit deserves, now did I?), and to be super logical with their feelings. Instead, if it weren't bad enough what the piece of shit did, we/the victim feels ashamed. How many times do women even think that maybe they did something to cause it?

No no no no no no no no no no no no no no-------------------------------!!!!!!

Own your strength. And own your absolute right to protect yourself. AND own that you are a viable person (woman) that deserves to be loved, treated right, and expect that no man should ever touch you incorrectly, hurt you whether in mind or body. The fuckers do it, I know, but you need to hold your head high and smack them right back, it you can. And girl if you can't smack them back, you still keep on holding your head up high.

Why can't we instill a little self-esteem in ourselves. As mothers, I know women want their children to be chock full of it. We all need to be chock full of it, or else we'll continue to be a nation of women believing the ultimate lie. That we aren't worth it. If you take that road far enough, you will kill yourself.

I could not get thru all of mysti's. I guess I got triggered, cause I actually did start feeling weird and I couldn't get thru all of it. Why should a person have to know to be private? Why do children get raped? Meaning how can we live in a world so evil that a child would be expected to run for their life when they see an adult, or that a child would be intrinsically expected to know to run from anyone that might hurt them? No, they are Born with Trust, and a loving parent shields, protects, and teaches them slowly as they can handle the true nature of evil in this world. Why should mysti and her husband have to know that evil lurks like that? So cowardly, to create personas and find someone to work it upon, I'm speaking of the perp, and cowardly is just not strong enough of a word for the way Tart feels about it.

I am just filled with anger that anyone would do even some of the things mysti says her fuckup piece of shit perp did, and I believe her. I guess its a control issue for me, because I'd like to hurt every perp out there, if it be done physically or emotionally, whatever will completely break them down. I don't think rapists and other criminals are getting their due, I do not feel Christianly sorry for them because for every jerk that acts out and says its because they were beaten every day or incurred some other abuse, there's thousands of citizens that took the same shit and turned out fine.

Well that's enough wasted on that subject. It looks like I will be doing some English teaching. I find more about my volunteer assignment later in the week. It will involve people who are learning Medical Terminology, which is so amazing since I just got done doing with that myself! Husband's getting nose surgery, so hopefully they will stop the wretched snoring.

Ve speak onlze in generalities, becos the enemy may ve leestening, no? I have to admit I really felt strongly the things that Enigma and mysti were saying on their sites, because a poor little mentally ill woman such as myself can't take harrassment or stupidity. They won't let me have a gun, but I have no problem calling the cops, and they do. Mess with my site and not only with comments be deleted, but I'll report you. There's no point to it, I take the necessary action. I've said this before but in case some weirdo is getting excited about anything said, it never hurts to SAY IT AGAIN.


mysti said...

Tart thank you.

You just made me cry, laugh and want to give you a big hug with what you wrote. I am sorry my story triggered you. I decided to share all I have because there are people on line who are so trusting like my husband and I were.

The next posts I share are going to be what hubby and I found out after this situation, and the steps we took.

Anything I post at all that might trigger a person I will make sure it is stated as a possible trigger beside the post name.

I have so much more to say to you but I am still crying and trying to get my thoughts organized.

I will comment more later.


Raine said...

hehehe- ummm I am a call the cops person. TOTALLY. and a few other things besides LMAO. I have been stalked so many times and not cyber stalked, stalked by exes that it doesnt even freak me out anymore. The last one that did it, I chased down (literally chased as in running down the street after him) with a stun gun. Didn't catch him, but I called him at work the next day and told him that next time I caught him peeking in my windows I WOULD catch him and I was gonna hold that stun gun on his balls til they turned into raisins!! Then I was gonna call the papers, his parents , the cops and his employers and let the whole freakin world know exactly what he was. Then I told him as far as stalkers went he wasnt even a good one and laughed at him. I never heard from him again. I have a few stories like. After being terrified one too many times I started fighting back and now "I" scare THEM. so take heart Tart dearest, bi-polar rage has it uses :D

Raine said...

heres another one- just because maybe you need a good laugh and I think you are the type that can appreciate the humor of it. I was at a garage where my b/f at the time worked. I was outside smoking and a friend of his joined me. We were semi secluded where we were smoking and the jerk suddenly pulls "it" out of his pants and tells me to suck it. Now I could have reacted with dismay, humiliation, shame, embarrassment etc etc etc. But did I? no. I smiled sweetly and reached for it gently and got a good hold and then took him for a walk. They make a very good leash. When I said jump, he jumped, when I said run, he ran. I paraded him around in front of the whole shop crewincluding his best friend (my b/f) and loudly announced how it happened that I had him on a leash and they all busted a gut laughing at him and ridiculing him. Needless to say- it NEVER happened again :P