Wednesday, April 18, 2007

It's a no-pic day on blogger today.

Imagine, if you will, a knarly lone tree in the middle of a green field. It's a strange tree, all by itself, with all of its branches flowing toward the left.

That would be my lone tree that won't print today on God's blessed Blogger. Fine. I'm no poet, but I just described it. I wanted it to be here at the top.

It's okay to be a lone individual. To be different. The key is to involve yourself in something positive, be it something positive for yourself that nobody sees, or may it flow over and affect other's lives positively.

Sit seething in your anger and it can _only go to bad places_. For YOU. If you find you cannot control your anger you owe it to TALK to someone, because that is a protection of OTHERS if not yourself.

Don't ever think you have the right to _take away (lives)_ from others or use your judgement to hurt others. That will righteously get you in jail, if you're caught by human hands, or into the gates of Hell even if you think you are so swift as to not be judged by humans.

What I don't understand about this situation with the asshole who did what any numnut with way too much rage and _access to guns_, is how they can say 'no one knew him' (aka: no one will take remote responsibility for no one catching the nut job beforehand).

The guy was an English major, a Senior no less, writing such disturbing stuff that he was sent to counseling AND his teacher admitted feeling VERY uncomfortable in his presence. HOW did he get so far in college writing frightening crap, almost graduating no less. THIS ONE THING is what we need to be looking for in our present num nuts that are waiting to perform the NEXT worst shooting in U.S. history.

I do have a right to say this. A) I was an English major (had to play the game to get my piece of paper). B) I have already been labeled by society as having Emotional Disturbance (though thankfully its possible to be emotionally disturbed and not have a thought to hurting others and may I say, even myself). If this guy was so scary, take that info and apply it to the other loners, the other people trying to threaten (like a loser, I might add).

It goes without saying that I feel such a sadness over this. Simultaneously, I feel such anger. I'm so glad I am not involved because it is precisely this anger that would have to be dealt with in order for me to personally go on with my life. I think we now see what a miracle the Amish's forgiveness was in a similar circumstance. Will mothers and fathers be able to rid themselves of the terrible after taste of someone else's supremely selfish (and damnable) acts? I cannot image having to deal with that.

As it is, I must deal with my own personal problems, such as my father's death, the ongoing stuff to take care of that and my own depression where I seem not to care about much. It's hard on my family, let me tell you. I must have been an angel previously, I must have been NICE to my family previously, because they hang in there, they keep speaking to me, they are KIND to me when I am not. And so I know I am blessed.

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