This is one of the messages of the new book 'Handle With Care' by Jodi Picoult. I'm not selling/advocating the book, I am really interested in this thought.
As much as I have tried to personally implode into my own little world I hope that I make a good impact on the world and there is still hope that Iwill get better and I will leave my house and live a more productive life one of these days. Besides my blog, I try mostly during the day to live and not bother anyone. I wanted to help Drop-in center but my efforts seem to not have made much impact there, and I guess that's to be expected. Nothing comes easily.
Simply put: I am grateful for the impact of the lives of the bloggers and people I have met through this blog. Your lives impact me.
Showing posts with label grant writing. Show all posts
Showing posts with label grant writing. Show all posts
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
Lucky gal.
As I write this I am in a cranked out mood. Cranky. Trying to get over it, but that's life.
I have been working on fixing a jacket for someone at the Drop-in Center. He will pay me a little to fix it and it is frustrating me this morning, as it is suede and the needle I am using is large and I am having difficulty getting it through. Arggg!
The thing also smells because the jacket owner is a smoker and I sometimes must take breaks from it to get away from the stench.
Long-time readers may remember that the Tart use to smoke, for about 10 years, but I quit a few years ago, and yes it often now smells bad to me to be in the extreme vicinity of it. Not always, but I don't like being blanketed in it with the thing on my lap. Who knew?
I am also obsessively recovering from having my feelings hurt at the Drop-in Center yesterday. It only takes one comment sometimes to send me hurting and upset and then - mad, then upset again. I won't grace it with discussion except to say it was fairly small, and I need to get over it. Yes, Tart sensitive. Must stop it.
So to take a break, I got on the computer and started looking up favorite things to cheer me up.
Of course, the ultimate cheer-up is knowing I'm picking up my precious girl (my new fawn Pug puppy) on Saturday!! Yes, I found a precious girl and she will be ready to go home on Friday, but Saturday's the day we will pick her up.
We have taken two pictures of her and when I was going off and being so obsessive about my feelings being hurt last night, Husband brought up her beautiful face on the laptop and reminded me what was important in life.
I am so lucky that I have a good homelife and my pets to keep me company during the day. Sometimes I want to be around people and of course, now I feel 'burned' about going to Drop-in and want to just say well the heck with you, I'm going to have my puppy to love up and take care of.
I can't seem to do that quite yet, because I promised, or said that I would, go to the Executive Director's birthday party on Friday at the Center. I don't want to let her down but I don't really want to go there anymore, at least not the way I'm feeling right now.
I have done good work with them - a fundraiser, proofing a grant, sending out three letters of inquiry for food grants - I have given when all that some others have done is taken, and of course it's a 'taker' that makes a jealous comment about me because there is a genuine friendship between the Executive Director and I.
No wonder I am friends with the Executive Director, we are friends, we do get along so well, and no wonder that some people are just jealous beyotches and truth be told I hate jealousy because I just don't know what to say - I almost feel sorry for the other person but I get mad because they are attacking me. It's just so uncomfortable and unfair.
And then I spend time thinking of what I should have said. Yeah, like I need this.
And I said I wouldn't talk about it.
But, on the upswing, I'm getting a puppy and I know I'm a lucky gal for that.
Thank you all for your comments on the previous couple of posts. I really do appreciate them.
Saturday, January 17, 2009
Cute chickie. (Happy Saturday!:)
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Not much to say on this Saturday. I had stuff to work on, like the library volunteering and grant stuff but I ended up taking a clonipin for the first time in weeks for anxiety. The day was shot as I tried to read, no wasn't happening, mostly ended sleeping it off.
As Scarlett O'Hara says ('Gone With the Wind'), "Tomorrow is another day!"
Friday, November 21, 2008
I'm not lazy; I'm just medicated!!:)
This phrase came to mind this morning when considering another night of bouncing back and forth between taking Seroquel, in an effort to get off of it. Last night was a no-take it night.
I ended up not going to bed until 4 a.m. (watching 'Citizen Kane' in the meantime - "ROSEBUD!!" - and cross-stitching till the wee hours) and then still getting up at 8 a.m. and here I am still up, and not wanting to go back to sleep. Yaay, me!!
I say 'Yaay, me!!' but what is clear is that I am a creature of chemicals, whether my own or the medication (and I admit that this contributed to some of my meltdowns yesterday - what an emotional, moody day that was for a while, as I became angry and sad all at once after these realizations. I took a break from blogging about surviving Seroquel for a day to see if I would in fact survive!:).
Meaning: I am so affected by a little 'ol pill. If not affected by a little 'ol pill I am left to a seemingly more natural state, which it looks like I AM CAPABLE of getting up in the morning, something that my body had completely forgotten for years at I have been medicated for years.
If not for the fact that I have had 2 hours of sleep and and am OH SO awake, I was considering getting off the Seroquel for good and not taking it anymore. It is just so awful to almost see the food cravings, to see myself unable to move in the morning or wanting to go back to bed so badly after taking it the night before that I want to be off it. At the same time, I don't want to risk mania (you heard it here, folks. As a bipolar I, mania takes me to Saturn, not a day of charging it at the mall or even within this stratosphere) by getting no sleep for days.
I help 'clean up' the big grant tonight at five, so I have something to do this evening and that usually revs me, and keeps me up late. Time will tell what will happen tomorrow - in the morning and if I get more sleep. If not, I will allow myself to have a wasted day on Sunday after taking it again. What's one wasted day, when you realize you have wasted years on this stuff?
See, I am my own pdoc half the time. I wanted so badly to call and ask what the hell to do yesterday when my mood was up, down, all around, and I was scared as to what was happening. But my Pdoc is only around on Mondays and nobody at the County answers these kind of calls. After years of dealing with Them, I knew I was on my own.
I did have moments, one moment I can remember, of feeling suicidal. But every moment was so fleeting, even that didn't last long, without much effort on my part. Thank God for the emotional ADD that occurs with this illness.
I think it's important to blog this stuff out, put it out there for other people who feel that their 'chemicals' (natural or not (the meds)) are messed up, because as bipolars, I think people relate and don't have people talking about it much.
My husband laughed when I said I was mad that a little pill could turn me upside down like this. I said, "I'm glad you can get a little chuckle out of this." He said, well don't you know, that's why you take the meds in the first place, because your chemicals are out of whack (I paraphrased it). Yes, I must be reminded that I am on Disability for a reason. I must be reminded that for all I accomplish, which seems minor, I do in fact have an illness. That is painful.
On a more positive note, I have shifted into overdrive in finishing the baby cross-stitch and in cross-stitching in general. It's something I can do, it has a neat outcome, because you can see your work and it's pretty. What more could you want from a hobby?:) And at the moment, I have the energy to work on it.
Thanks to all for listening. I hope you have a great day, a well day. I mean that.
Tart:)
I ended up not going to bed until 4 a.m. (watching 'Citizen Kane' in the meantime - "ROSEBUD!!" - and cross-stitching till the wee hours) and then still getting up at 8 a.m. and here I am still up, and not wanting to go back to sleep. Yaay, me!!
I say 'Yaay, me!!' but what is clear is that I am a creature of chemicals, whether my own or the medication (and I admit that this contributed to some of my meltdowns yesterday - what an emotional, moody day that was for a while, as I became angry and sad all at once after these realizations. I took a break from blogging about surviving Seroquel for a day to see if I would in fact survive!:).
Meaning: I am so affected by a little 'ol pill. If not affected by a little 'ol pill I am left to a seemingly more natural state, which it looks like I AM CAPABLE of getting up in the morning, something that my body had completely forgotten for years at I have been medicated for years.
If not for the fact that I have had 2 hours of sleep and and am OH SO awake, I was considering getting off the Seroquel for good and not taking it anymore. It is just so awful to almost see the food cravings, to see myself unable to move in the morning or wanting to go back to bed so badly after taking it the night before that I want to be off it. At the same time, I don't want to risk mania (you heard it here, folks. As a bipolar I, mania takes me to Saturn, not a day of charging it at the mall or even within this stratosphere) by getting no sleep for days.
I help 'clean up' the big grant tonight at five, so I have something to do this evening and that usually revs me, and keeps me up late. Time will tell what will happen tomorrow - in the morning and if I get more sleep. If not, I will allow myself to have a wasted day on Sunday after taking it again. What's one wasted day, when you realize you have wasted years on this stuff?
See, I am my own pdoc half the time. I wanted so badly to call and ask what the hell to do yesterday when my mood was up, down, all around, and I was scared as to what was happening. But my Pdoc is only around on Mondays and nobody at the County answers these kind of calls. After years of dealing with Them, I knew I was on my own.
I did have moments, one moment I can remember, of feeling suicidal. But every moment was so fleeting, even that didn't last long, without much effort on my part. Thank God for the emotional ADD that occurs with this illness.
I think it's important to blog this stuff out, put it out there for other people who feel that their 'chemicals' (natural or not (the meds)) are messed up, because as bipolars, I think people relate and don't have people talking about it much.
My husband laughed when I said I was mad that a little pill could turn me upside down like this. I said, "I'm glad you can get a little chuckle out of this." He said, well don't you know, that's why you take the meds in the first place, because your chemicals are out of whack (I paraphrased it). Yes, I must be reminded that I am on Disability for a reason. I must be reminded that for all I accomplish, which seems minor, I do in fact have an illness. That is painful.
On a more positive note, I have shifted into overdrive in finishing the baby cross-stitch and in cross-stitching in general. It's something I can do, it has a neat outcome, because you can see your work and it's pretty. What more could you want from a hobby?:) And at the moment, I have the energy to work on it.
Thanks to all for listening. I hope you have a great day, a well day. I mean that.
Tart:)
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
The ABC's of grant writing
Raine asked an interesting question: “so you like ask for grants ? is that it?”
Well, there’s a lot to it that I am finding out about. The long story is this:
1) You’ve got to Find the Grants (lots of research)
2) You’ve got to Apply for the Grants (lots of writing & proof-reading & having the info to put in them.)
We’re talking about grants for a non-profit, which is where the majority of grants are, as opposed to an individual or a for-profit business.
This means the organization has done the legwork and has received the Non-Profit 503 (c)(3) designation from the IRS.
My wonderful person that I am working with explained to me that the organization is like a stool, with the organization being the top flat part of the stool itself, and the consumer being the ‘butt’ that sits on it (and in this case rests its weary soul upon it!). The $money$ that supports the organization is the four legs of the stool:
1) Government grants
2) Fundraising
3) Corporate/Foundation Grants
4) Selling things and making a profit for the organization
These four things are the money sources that keep a non-profit going. And they need money all the time, for everything from administrative costs, to paying for the light bill, to food for the consumers (the folks that show up every day and are the reason the place exists!).
I am working on corporate grants for the food program at the Drop In Center. This wasn't too hard as I found the right phrase to put into Google and I was set! I was so excited when I found the pages on the internet where it directs you to apply for a grant from say, the local grocery store foundation!
Sometimes you apply with their form, sometimes you conjure up a letter to ask them for the privilege of being thought of at their next board meeting for a grant – to start the process.
So, now that I have found a few grocery store foundations that may possibly give money, I must start a) filling out the forms they have provided or b) send a letter to tell them of our need. So there is writing involved especially when thinking of what to say in that letter.
Also, there is a lot of grant writing to do, since apparently often only about 1 out of 2 or 3 grant requests actually gets filled. That means a lot of work just to receive the monies needed to run a program.
You don’t know if all or one of your requested grants are going to be filled. It could literally be feast or famine for the Drop In Center’s food program, unless we make a concerted effort to write out about six grant requests to make sure we are safe, in the effort to make sure we get two actually granted. Whew! That’s a lot of work!
There’s a lot of writing and thinking about writing involved in this. I can only do what I can do a little at a time, to wrap my head around all the little parts involved in a large grant package/proposal. But it’s a challenge I’ve accepted. I’ll keep you updated.:)
Well, there’s a lot to it that I am finding out about. The long story is this:
1) You’ve got to Find the Grants (lots of research)
2) You’ve got to Apply for the Grants (lots of writing & proof-reading & having the info to put in them.)
We’re talking about grants for a non-profit, which is where the majority of grants are, as opposed to an individual or a for-profit business.
This means the organization has done the legwork and has received the Non-Profit 503 (c)(3) designation from the IRS.
My wonderful person that I am working with explained to me that the organization is like a stool, with the organization being the top flat part of the stool itself, and the consumer being the ‘butt’ that sits on it (and in this case rests its weary soul upon it!). The $money$ that supports the organization is the four legs of the stool:
1) Government grants
2) Fundraising
3) Corporate/Foundation Grants
4) Selling things and making a profit for the organization
These four things are the money sources that keep a non-profit going. And they need money all the time, for everything from administrative costs, to paying for the light bill, to food for the consumers (the folks that show up every day and are the reason the place exists!).
I am working on corporate grants for the food program at the Drop In Center. This wasn't too hard as I found the right phrase to put into Google and I was set! I was so excited when I found the pages on the internet where it directs you to apply for a grant from say, the local grocery store foundation!
Sometimes you apply with their form, sometimes you conjure up a letter to ask them for the privilege of being thought of at their next board meeting for a grant – to start the process.
So, now that I have found a few grocery store foundations that may possibly give money, I must start a) filling out the forms they have provided or b) send a letter to tell them of our need. So there is writing involved especially when thinking of what to say in that letter.
Also, there is a lot of grant writing to do, since apparently often only about 1 out of 2 or 3 grant requests actually gets filled. That means a lot of work just to receive the monies needed to run a program.
You don’t know if all or one of your requested grants are going to be filled. It could literally be feast or famine for the Drop In Center’s food program, unless we make a concerted effort to write out about six grant requests to make sure we are safe, in the effort to make sure we get two actually granted. Whew! That’s a lot of work!
There’s a lot of writing and thinking about writing involved in this. I can only do what I can do a little at a time, to wrap my head around all the little parts involved in a large grant package/proposal. But it’s a challenge I’ve accepted. I’ll keep you updated.:)
Friday, October 10, 2008
Delving into the world of Grants!
I spent much of my day researching places that could be potential 'givers of money' for a particular reason for the Drop In Center.
Wow! It was a lot of fun, especially when I found my first address that I could send a request to!
I was hopping up and down for joy and praising God for leading me on this path, and frankly for helping me, when I don't quite know what I am doing.
I know He's leading me and I'm happy about it. I have prayed to be led the way He wants me to, and although these things take time, both my being led & grant writing in general, I am feeling GOOOOD about it.
I am thinking of suggesting a crochet class at the Center, and maybe the products made by people could be sold, for fund-raising purposes.
I know they will say, 'Hunh, I wonder who could teach that class?:)' If they are thinking it's me that will be INTERESTING as I have been avoiding teaching anything most of my life, especially the technicalities of making something. They may not like the idea at all for all I know.:)
Wow! It was a lot of fun, especially when I found my first address that I could send a request to!
I was hopping up and down for joy and praising God for leading me on this path, and frankly for helping me, when I don't quite know what I am doing.
I know He's leading me and I'm happy about it. I have prayed to be led the way He wants me to, and although these things take time, both my being led & grant writing in general, I am feeling GOOOOD about it.
I am thinking of suggesting a crochet class at the Center, and maybe the products made by people could be sold, for fund-raising purposes.
I know they will say, 'Hunh, I wonder who could teach that class?:)' If they are thinking it's me that will be INTERESTING as I have been avoiding teaching anything most of my life, especially the technicalities of making something. They may not like the idea at all for all I know.:)
Thursday, October 9, 2008
Feeling better today.
As much as I love her, and I really like her a lot I thought, I have no desire to see any of Angelina Jolie's latest movies. She does a movie on Daniel Pearl, playing as his wife Marianne, admitting that it really was a downer playing that particular time period (we all know what happened to Mr. Pearl).
Now she does a movie, 'Changling,' where she admits when she first read it she wanted 'to stay as far away from it as possible.' So guess what? I am too. As a person who has spent more time in a mental hospital than her character does in this movie, I don't want to see it, hear it or speak it either. The brief synopsis that I just got from MSN was spoiler-alert good enough for me. Don't need to see it now, thanks.:)
My sore throat was significantly better when I got up today. Thank you to Tracy for your home remedies, particularly the garlic, which I had a lot of at the house and took plenty of. I really think it helped a lot!:) I also had chicken soup for dinner tonight (how did they make that 'terrible' supposedly-MSG laden Progresso only 1 little point in Weight Watchers? AWESOME!).
Spent the day at Drop In Center, some of it discussing the grant I will be working on. I need to get off my duff and work on that!!:) I'm excited, it's for a good cause.
Now she does a movie, 'Changling,' where she admits when she first read it she wanted 'to stay as far away from it as possible.' So guess what? I am too. As a person who has spent more time in a mental hospital than her character does in this movie, I don't want to see it, hear it or speak it either. The brief synopsis that I just got from MSN was spoiler-alert good enough for me. Don't need to see it now, thanks.:)
My sore throat was significantly better when I got up today. Thank you to Tracy for your home remedies, particularly the garlic, which I had a lot of at the house and took plenty of. I really think it helped a lot!:) I also had chicken soup for dinner tonight (how did they make that 'terrible' supposedly-MSG laden Progresso only 1 little point in Weight Watchers? AWESOME!).
Spent the day at Drop In Center, some of it discussing the grant I will be working on. I need to get off my duff and work on that!!:) I'm excited, it's for a good cause.
Thursday, October 2, 2008
Keeping busy, feeling better.:)
Ahhh! Feeling better because I have gotten a lot done, and if nothing else, stayed quite busy these last few days.:)
Yesterday I did not leave the house, but I learned so much about grant writing off of the internet. I really studied this site at www.raise-funds.com from a Google search and printed 14 pages of good stuff, highlighting along the way and getting an idea of how the performance of a grant writer should be evaluated, all the way to actually writing a proposal. Neat stuff!
It turns out that it is recommended that a grant writer be paid hourly or by the project, Not by if the grant is received (or actually granted) or not. The work is in the work to get the grant, not if it is granted!
Also, you should not be padding a request for 'real money' (for the operation or whatever it is you're asking money for) into the request as that's not really right and granter's are not keen on that anyway.
I am learning so much!!
So, I have an actual appointment to meet with a very cool and supportive person at Drop In Center and she said she would not leave me out in the cold, she is really going to help me through this (proposal-writing process)!
I am very much looking forward to doing something that is:
- Writing
- Using my dang degree
- Doing a 'real' freelance job (one that has an actual Association and is in demand)
- Helping a very good cause that I believe in
The Drop In Center is for the mentally ill by the mentally ill. Some very stable mentally ill women started this non-profit organization with grants and will continue to need them to continue the center.
It really is doing a world of good for a lot of people. People can come from all over to talk to each other, to play games and relax, to get on the computer - and to realize they are not alone in mental illness, and that mental illness doesn't have to be the focus of their life, its just a part of it, and that other people understand.
What a gift these ladies have created! And I'm so honored and hopeful and want to work hard to help them.
Today, I have gone to the library to turn in sheets that I put into the database, return books on scrapbooking for the family (and re-check out two more, he he!) and got books on Grant Writing, to get a better handle on it and understand it more, all before my appointment with the Center next week.
Thank you for the support received on my blog about some of the topics I've been talking about on here. You guys are great! Hugs & blessings to you all!
As an update from Denise at her http://samaritanwomen.blogspot.com/ blog: she thanks the many people for their prayers, and has such good news - her dear niece will get to go home to see her baby and husband to recover from her C-section, and in weeks will go for the heart surgery. It also turns out that the hole in her heart is not quite as significant as previously thought.
I am so glad for Denise and her family, and I haven't quit praying for you, as I continue to pray for so many blog friends.
God bless you all, and I wish a good day for all in blog land. Thank you for your support!:)
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