tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22354345.post116598599045163761..comments2023-08-15T05:42:02.314-04:00Comments on Adventures of a JungleTart: I Wanna Talk About It Some More'Tarthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14649798961801869778noreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22354345.post-1166531075967437752006-12-19T07:24:00.000-05:002006-12-19T07:24:00.000-05:00Well, I guess we'll just consider it a mutual blac...Well, I guess we'll just consider it a mutual blackmail situation that cancels itself out, because you know too much too in my confession in the previous comment!Cie Cheesemeisterhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14871507564733240927noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22354345.post-1166394600289353482006-12-17T17:30:00.000-05:002006-12-17T17:30:00.000-05:00****First paragraph might have spoiler for some***...****First paragraph might have spoiler for some****<BR/><BR/>Well, this is sick I guess, but the answer that mulls around in my mind is: "Well yes, the neighbor's dog ate the last two, and I'm working on miscarrying this one." But I think that might cause some people to break down. Which might be fun to watch. :) Okay, partially kidding.<BR/><BR/>It's not that I don't <I>want</I> children, sometimes I consider/fantasize about it, it's just that it literally comes with health risks that I know about <I>before</I> the fact and while I've been pretty strong to get out of my last two psychoses, I don't know if I can do all that AND have a sweet innocent hanger on at the same time. Personally, I think pregnancy and the birthing process take unimaginable strength and to add to it the kind of (literal) insanity that requires shots of antipsychotics in your rear to come down from - well, it comes down to I really question my strength and those of my family that would have to watch helplessly nearby.<BR/><BR/>Truth be told, I am looking for the person out there who has suffered diabilitating, out to Pluto, mind-numbing, beyond the worst horror film terrifying you've ever seen psychosis (even once) and turned out really rockin' after recovery. I can think of BiPolar Guy, and that's why I put him on a pedestal, besides his mind numbing MENSA smartness. Honestly, I have advised and helped a few people in my life and I'm looking for <I>my</I> guru. I admit that I'm bitter that I haven't found that person, I've been left out in the cold so to speak, but recognize I'm lucky to have the many supporters in my life that keep me going anyway. I think I'm going to have to look on Amazon to even find if anyone's written about it, anyone's been there. Sometimes I think about how Native Americans would think it's a nifty thing to be able to go there sometimes and I secretly (well, it's out now) imagine myself as a shawwoman, or basically someone of the emotional depth to understand some things that aren't apparent to others. (Hello, that's an easy button for me!)<BR/><BR/>Now you must burn your computer components and pluck your eyes, for you know too much.<BR/><BR/>:)'Tarthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14649798961801869778noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22354345.post-1166359771423418162006-12-17T07:49:00.000-05:002006-12-17T07:49:00.000-05:00Tart,It's none of their goddamn business that you ...Tart,<BR/>It's none of their goddamn business that you don't want to have kids! People like this drive me crazy! Kudos for being nice to them. I'm such an asshole that I might just straight up say something like "because I'm prone to eating my young" in response to the question "why don't you have any kids?" (I actually do have a son, but in the event that I had never had kids.)<BR/>The thing that sticks in my craw is people telling me that I "should" want to "correct" the fact that I never want to be involved in another romantic relationship and I find "hooking up" extremely distasteful. The one man that I could love in that way is no longer a dweller of this planet, if you take my meaning. I have been in a myriad of awful relationships that were abusive in one way or another. I always end up self-harming because I am suicidal when I am eventually done dirty by these bastards. <BR/>Guys feel it's their place to try and coerce me into giving them a chance. "I'm not like those other guys." Yeah, you're Satan's son, so you're 1000 times worse! Relatives remind me that I'm "not getting any younger. Well, no shit, Sherlock! I wouldn't be getting any younger if I had some ball and chain attached to my ankle either!<BR/>Sorry for the rant, but I loved this post so it inspired me, and I'm a little anxious and hypomanicky right now!Cie Cheesemeisterhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14871507564733240927noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22354345.post-1166147168445236002006-12-14T20:46:00.000-05:002006-12-14T20:46:00.000-05:00hmm well i cant say yes to what mysti said cause i...hmm well i cant say yes to what mysti said cause i don't know you well yet;P but I can say you seem awefully nice and it's a shame folks gotta give you grief like that... take care and ohh yeah I'm siging you up;)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22354345.post-1166013606782406282006-12-13T07:40:00.000-05:002006-12-13T07:40:00.000-05:00(((Tart))) I am glad you were able to vent some he...(((Tart))) I am glad you were able to vent some here. I know you are pissed, and nothing I say will help that. Know though that "I" know just how loving a person you are! God gave you a huge amount of love. I feel blessed to know you and call you friend. Talk with you soon!Tracyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04095334529245360072noreply@blogger.com